IT'S LITERALLY TOMORROW!! and all of you in the uk better be going because i need someone to send back pics of how gorgeous they both are! pls send videos too if you can, i really want to see how far my babies have gone. also if anyone is thinking of hanging around/maybe meeting them??? message me???? or at least remember to ask sik why there are rumors he listens to orange caramel 👀

i couldn't afford to go when they were here and no way can i get the money together to take a trip across the ocean PLUS hotel and tickets. :( i hope they do another tour soon.

It's really weird. I left on such a high note, everyone was all over my performances and kept saying how sad they were that I was stepping out, but it's like all it took was a few years for them to go from supportive of a child's wishes to be left alone to furious with the awkward teenager I'd become. Got to be so bad that I just stopped going anywhere with my dad or sister—since they were always being papped—just to avoid being brought up in some cheap mag. Can't even count the supposed affairs or arrests I've been involved with. As far as they're concerned, I'm the spoiled fucking terror that left them behind to get high and make shit music.

I work better under pressure or when I'm exhausted. It's like the stress of everything gives me that false sense of euphoria, energizes the parts of me that would normally be quieted by insecurity. The come down afterwards, however, is the absolute worst. I get so, so sick. Worth it though.

@siksri: i promise not to get weird

I still don't know what I'm doing with my life, but that's half the fun of it. If you'd asked me this ten years ago maybe I could give you a sort of roundabout answer of what I was thinking about getting into. Nothing concrete, though. Not even when I was a kid did I have any idea as to who I wanted to be. The best I could ever say was that I wanted a house, a big yard, and more pets than any person could handle. I wanted super powers and to have more money than my dad so I wouldn't have to rely on an allowance to buy candy. Nothing's changed, I still feel the same way on all of that. Just like I still don't know what I want to do. But, for right now, I'm happy. More than happy really. I've really found something that hits all the right parts of me not just intellectually or artistically, but emotionally too. That's real important, I think. That's what separates a job from a career. It's the passion, you know? The emotional connection. I have that right now. It's nice.